Thing is, there are many different "types" of alcoholics. There are falling down drunks, and functioning drunks.
I know a man that drinks every day, almost continuous. Yet you would never know it if you didn't know him. I've never seen him falling down drunk.....or without a beer within 10 feet of him.
Both of my grandfathers were drunks. My Mom's dad was a MEAN drunk, and drank what little money they had EVERY night at the local bar. 13 kids at home, and didn't spend any money to feed his kids, and he beat his wife. Some of his sons followed his path, some didn't.
My dad's dad wasn't mean, but still pissed away alot of what should have gone to take care of his kids. He would come over to my parent's home, and ask my mom (my dad was still at work) for some money, cause he was short that week and needed it to buy some groc
eries for his family. (He had divorced my grandma and had a 2nd family). So my mom was a soft touch.
One day, she gave him some money, then followed him......yup.....he went right to the saloon. So much for feeding his kids. So my mom told my dad, and he said "NEVER give him any more money!" Next time gramps showed up, gave the sob story, and my mom told him "Sorry, we don't have any extra to give you." He then went on to lecture my mom on how she should manage her money better!
All for booze. He thought it was more important to party with his buddies then to be honest and take care of his responsibilities.
He CHOSE that....unfortunately.