It essentially depends on your mindset and your desire to accomplish the task in which you speak.

First.. if the task is worthy of your facing your fears... if so, don't make it an option for you.

Mindset is I "have" to do this.

After the accident I was very self conscientious of my appearance and what I didn't have any longer. Why people were looking at me.. if they would stare. If they held pity for me. If they thought I was less of a man. Etc.

And it bothered me very much.. to the point I would avoid public situations if possible. I let it lead my life.. I was a slave to myself. I tried the substance approach to try and mask it..

At one point in my life I had enough of being controlled and decided I "had" to change.

Once things became "have to's", I forced myself to do them... and strangely there were no "boogey man" type fears lurking outside my mind. Sure I still get those that look at how I walk or how I get around.. those that stare.. but so freaking what. I am me.. and I am not changing.

Basically.. it is what it is.. I am what I am.. but I will be damned if I will let it lead my life.

I have issues with those that lack respect than these worrisome type questions that could plague your mind of what others are thinking.

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Say, going to a store, I'm okay for a few minutes, but after 5-10, I need to leave, otherwise I start getting nervous, mild sweating and that's while knowing no one is looking, no one gives a damn that I'm there to get a dozen eggs, cargo pants and jumper cables. If I'm with someone, I'm usually okay for much longer periods of time. Certain times, I'm cool, I can be in public place for hours and not think about it. Other times, I don't make it past the second set of doors before the heart starts racing and its harder to breathe.

I've just assumed I'm a coward in public settings, but I continuously try to put myself into those situations as often as possible. I'll even go to the store, just to walk around trying to break myself of this.

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I never considered it to be any cowardly act.. more so putting someone outside of their comfort zone so to speak.

Basically your above statement is the route I took.. and after time the comfort level established itself.

Crowds now just irate me so to speak.. I want to do what I want when I want.. not having to depend upon the action of another in a crowded area. Most of the time now, I only put up with it if the situation benefits another.. such as Disney World come June. Personally I will hate it.. but the kids and wife will love it.. so I will suck it up and deal with my quirks.

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I'm not much of a crowd person either. As a big person I hate having to move through them. Shouting "excuse me's" and having to literally push people out of my way is no fun especially when I try to be a respectful and polite individual.

I've never been to Disney World in the summer so I wish you luck. I have been there at least 6 times in my life though and the crowds were never terrible there but I can't speak for the summer time. My sister actually worked at Disney World for half a year last year and we visited her in Orlando. It's a crazy place. Half the population of that city has to be tourists. It's incredible and ridiculous at the same time.

However I'm not a person that enjoys theme park rides. I dislike roller coasters, high drop things, spinny dizzy things. All that crap just makes me feel sick.

I'm not a huge fan of crowds myself. I don't mind one on one chatting, but some people think they need to talk to everyone they see. When we went to Elitch Gardens theme park, the waiting in lines, elbow to elbow with everyone... didn't sit well with me. I wanted the day to be over. We stayed until they kicked us out. Those girls have NO CLUE how spoiled they are.

What really puzzles me is I've been told many times I'm great with people, great with customer service, but how the hell does going to the movies alone or DMV or friggin grocery store panic the hell out of me?

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I spent the last 2 years systematically changing my personality from being quite introverted to being highly extroverted.

I am actually quite proud of what I have done and accomplished in this regards.

If you or anyone is really interested I can go over what I did and what it will take to accomplish this.

I dont claim to be gods gift to parties or meeting people; I just claim to be an average guy that did what it took to change my personality and ability to communicate with others.

IMO one has to first realize this isnt just about communicating one person to another it is how you feel about yourself and what you say.

There is a famous quote by ayn rand that says - 'In order to say I Love you, you have to be able to say the I first' ... think about that

I'd love to know. There's times where I'm the life of the event and it's a great time, but inside I'm at times nervous like a prom queen losing her virginity.

It's something I noticed strongly after mom passed away and have gradually been forcing myself into situations in hopes of handling it better.

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I am reminded of the great Charlie Sheen and his nuggets of wisdom this past week when I read this: "Can't is the cancer of happen", "Nike's slogan isn't Just Try It"

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Easy fix - Always remember you are a GB Packer fan. Puts the rest of the world in it's respective place.

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I wish it were only that easy.

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