I wrote that post partly tongue in cheek, but there is some truth to what I said too. You say that Midwesterners are respectful, but East Coasters are self-centered. As I see it, that's just the problem with so many Midwesterners -- they're blind to their own self-centeredness because they're so
nice. Don't get me wrong: I have nothing against niceness. But so many people around here are so focused on being
nice that they're afraid of confrontation. They're so intent on not hurting someone's feelings that they won't just come out and say what they think. So their niceness degenerates into flakiness, and it drives me nuts. I'd far rather have someone say, "You know, I'm just not interested, but thanks anyway," or even, "I think that's a fucking dumb idea -- go away," than "Oh, wow, that sounds great!" -- but the person never shows up. And that's the experience I get time after time around here. People won't commit to ANYTHING, but neither will they give a firm refusal. They don't see how incredibly
self-centered their outward niceness is.
It's a personal preference, obviously. I'd far rather find out in 10 seconds that you don't like me than find out weeks or months later that you were just too nice to turn me down openly. I don't like wasting time, and the less time I invest, the less it hurts when the inevitable happens. I'd prefer spending my time with people who truly want to be with me, even if that's only a few.
In other words, I'd rather have two sincere admirers than dozens of very nice flakes.