Zero2Cool
12 years ago
[list=1]
  • A computer doesn't care if you stick something inside them for your personal pleasure.(ie: a game disk)
  • A computer doesn't get hangups if you spend loads of time with a woman
  • A computer never says "you never bring me flowers anymore."
  • A computer will never ask 'Does my bum look big in this?'
  • A computers disposition remains the same all month
  • Computers always come back for more!
  • Computers always tell you when they have problems
  • Computers appreciate it when you tie up the phone line with them
  • Computers are also a good paper weight
  • Computers are cheaper to run
  • Computers are easy to turn on.
  • Computers are happy for you not to wash & shave all weekend.
  • Computers are happy if you connect them to another one, even the same type
  • Computers are happy to have a picture of a newer model stuck next to them
  • Computers are happy to show you pornography
  • Computers are logical
  • Computers are made to minimize the amount of time and effort inserted in achieving the "goal"
  • Computers are not back seat drivers
  • Computers are precise
  • Computers can be partly upgraded
  • Computers can be programmed to do something useful
  • Computers can be taught not to pass on viruses
  • Computers do exactly what you tell them to
  • Computers do not use perfumes, they do not have bad smells!
  • Computers don't ask for money
  • Computers don't buy a new pair of shoes every month
  • Computers don't eat all of the good stuff from your fridge first
  • Computers don't eat your chocolate
  • Computers don't expect you to be able to read their minds
  • Computers don't fall asleep during Match of the Day
  • Computers don't get crazy if you get up and walk away in mid-sentence
  • Computers don't get jealous if you use another one
  • Computers don't get ugly when they get old
  • Computers don't get upset if you only use them for 30 seconds
  • Computers don't get upset if you use them for 12 hours without a break
  • Computers don't get upset when you go on holiday without them
  • Computers don't have a compulsive urge to talk crap if they've got nothing to say
  • Computers don't like shopping
  • Computers don't make horrible dinners
  • Computers don't mind if you never speak to them
  • Computers don't mind you farting whilst you're using them
  • Computers don't nag [except perhaps if they're running Vista ]
  • Computers don't order stupid entree's in restaurants, then ask you to trade with them
  • Computers don't say, "Not tonight darling, I have a headache".
  • Computers don't think
  • Computers don't try to introduce you to their parents
  • Computers don't want pets or babies
  • Computers don't watch mindless sit-coms on TV
  • Computers don't bitch about their friends
  • Computers don't have periods
  • Computers don't require chocolate to make them happy
  • Computers have good memory
  • Computers give you another chance if the RAM goes bad
  • Computers have more things to press
  • Computers like being chained to a desk (some even have bondage ports built in)
  • Computers like to play with each other for you
  • Computers never leave you for your best friend
  • Computers never smell of fish
  • Computers play games or get serious when YOU want to
  • Computers reboot much faster
  • Computers stay the same size, even after 5 years
  • Computers stay when you tell them too
  • Computers treat your woman with the same respect as you
  • Computers usually tell you when they have a virus
  • Computers will accept a 3 1/2 inch floppy and be happy
  • Computers will go down on you
  • Computers will help you solve your problems
  • Computers work better the more RAM you put in them
  • It's easy to upgrade to a newer model
  • It's not embarrassing to take a differently colored one to see your parents
  • The old computer works just the same even after you've got a new model
  • When your computer starts to smoke you can get another one
  • Women usually have good hardware but bad software
  • You can change computer hardware or software when you want to
  • You can deal with computer outputs
  • You can delete things you don't want your computer to remember
  • You can invite lots of friends of both sexes to play with your computer all together and it won't complain
  • You can name your computer anything you want
  • You can share your computer with your friends
  • You can stop for a beer break whilst using your computer, it just waits for you to come back
  • You can switch off a computer
  • You can turn on a computer, have a beer, watch the big match, and when you come back, it's still turned on
  • You can turn the computer off when the footy's on
  • You can turn the sound off
  • You can upgrade your computers FAT partitions
  • You can use your computer as many times as you want
  • You don't get BLOND computers [Alien edit: yes you do, they're called Macs ]
  • You don't need to continually tell your computer you love it
  • You don't need to cook for computers
  • You don't need to pay computers for adult fun
  • You don't need to wine and dine a computer before you use it
  • You don't need to remember your computers birthday or anniversary
  • You only have to punch information into a computer once
  • You're never embarrassed to show your computer to your parents, even when it's really old
  • Your computer always looks good in the morning
  • Your computer doesn't go home to mum if your office computer went down on you today
  • Your computer is always a pleasure to turn on
  • Your computer never makes you sleep in the wet spot
  • Your computer will happily play crude adult games with you
  • Your new computer doesn't mind using the old computers extras
    • [*]Your new computer is happy to sit on the old computers furniture[/list]
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      Zero2Cool (6h) : Packers LT Jordan Morgan did not allow a single pressure across 23 pass-blocking snaps vs. Jets last night, per PFF
      Mucky Tundra (10h) : With buckeye and the reasonable couple, we're currently sitting at 10
      buckeyepackfan (10h) : Just posted to re-up on our FFL.
      Zero2Cool (16h) : If healthy after, then thats all I care. Well, no drops would be nice
      wpr (17h) : I made it through the 1st Q.
      dfosterf (10-Aug) : Just gotta figure out how.
      dfosterf (10-Aug) : Could have been a worse start, so there is that.
      beast (10-Aug) : Yeah, someone tell the Packers football season has started, seems like they weren't ready for it
      Mucky Tundra (10-Aug) : Sooooooo many penalties
      Mucky Tundra (10-Aug) : It may only be preseason, but this game is a trip to the dentist
      Zero2Cool (10-Aug) : Packers do bad -- FREAK OUT!!!!!!
      Zero2Cool (10-Aug) : Packers do good -- eh only preseason
      dfosterf (10-Aug) : Well that half was fun
      Zero2Cool (10-Aug) : Great, zayne is down
      Zero2Cool (9-Aug) : 13 minutes away from kickkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkoffff
      Zero2Cool (9-Aug) : Had Celebration of Life for my uncle up north. wicked rain hope it dont come south
      Mucky Tundra (9-Aug) : THE GREEN BAY PACKERS ARE PLAYING FOOTBALL TONIGHT!!!!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!!
      Zero2Cool (9-Aug) : Woo-hoo
      TheKanataThrilla (9-Aug) : NFL Network is broadcasting the game tonight, but not in Canada. Not sure why as no local television is showing the game.
      beast (8-Aug) : But the Return from IR designations had to be applied by the 53 man cutdown.
      beast (8-Aug) : It's a new rule, so it's not clear, but my understanding was that they could be IR'd at any time
      Mucky Tundra (8-Aug) : *had to be IRed at 53
      Mucky Tundra (8-Aug) : beast, I thought the designate return from IR players had to be IR at cutdowns to 53, not before
      beast (8-Aug) : It's a brand new rule, either last season or this season, prior, all pre-season IRs were done for the season
      beast (8-Aug) : But the Packers would have to use one for their return from IR spots on him, when they cut down to 53.
      beast (8-Aug) : I think the NFL recently changed the IR rules, so maybe the season might not be over for OL Glover.
      Zero2Cool (8-Aug) : Packers star Howton, first NFLPA prez, dies at 95 😔
      dfosterf (8-Aug) : Apparently it is too complicated for several to follow your simple instructions, but I digress
      dfosterf (8-Aug) : Zero- Did you see what I posted about Voice of Reason and his wife? She posted over at fleaflicker that they are both "In"
      Zero2Cool (7-Aug) : Well, not crazy, it makes sense. Crazy I didn't notice/find it earlier
      Zero2Cool (7-Aug) : it's crazy how one stored procedure to get data bogged everything down for speed here
      dfosterf (7-Aug) : to herd cats or goldfish without a bowl. They reminded me of the annual assembly of our fantasy league
      dfosterf (7-Aug) : out on a field trip, outfitting them with little yellow smocks. Most of the little folk were well behaved, but several were like trying
      dfosterf (7-Aug) : Yesterday my wife and I spent the afternoon on the waterfront here in Alexandria, Va. A daycare company took about 15 three/four year olds
      wpr (7-Aug) : seems faster. yay
      dfosterf (7-Aug) : Wife of reason posted on the in/out thread on fleaflicker that both she and vor are in
      Zero2Cool (7-Aug) : This page was generated in 0.135 seconds.
      Mucky Tundra (7-Aug) : Tbh, I can never tell the difference in speed unless it's completely shitting the bed
      Zero2Cool (7-Aug) : Sure does feel like site is more snappy
      Zero2Cool (6-Aug) : I thought that was the Lions OL
      Mucky Tundra (6-Aug) : Travis Glover placed on IR; seasons over for him
      Zero2Cool (6-Aug) : found bad sql in database, maybe site faster now?
      dfosterf (5-Aug) : I'm going to call that a good move.
      Zero2Cool (4-Aug) : Packers sign CB Corey Ballentine
      Zero2Cool (4-Aug) : I'm not sure how to kill the draft order just yet so it's not so confusing.
      Mucky Tundra (4-Aug) : *to be able
      Mucky Tundra (4-Aug) : and because it's not a dynasty league (which makes a lot more sense to be ability to trade picks)
      Mucky Tundra (4-Aug) : Oh I know; I was just exploring and it blew my mind that you could trade picks because of the whole reordering thing
      Mucky Tundra (4-Aug) : Zero, I think I preferred my offer: your 1st for my 15th rounder
      Zero2Cool (4-Aug) : Keep in mind, we do a draft reorder once all members locked in
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