Zero2Cool
11 years ago
[list=1]
  • A computer doesn't care if you stick something inside them for your personal pleasure.(ie: a game disk)
  • A computer doesn't get hangups if you spend loads of time with a woman
  • A computer never says "you never bring me flowers anymore."
  • A computer will never ask 'Does my bum look big in this?'
  • A computers disposition remains the same all month
  • Computers always come back for more!
  • Computers always tell you when they have problems
  • Computers appreciate it when you tie up the phone line with them
  • Computers are also a good paper weight
  • Computers are cheaper to run
  • Computers are easy to turn on.
  • Computers are happy for you not to wash & shave all weekend.
  • Computers are happy if you connect them to another one, even the same type
  • Computers are happy to have a picture of a newer model stuck next to them
  • Computers are happy to show you pornography
  • Computers are logical
  • Computers are made to minimize the amount of time and effort inserted in achieving the "goal"
  • Computers are not back seat drivers
  • Computers are precise
  • Computers can be partly upgraded
  • Computers can be programmed to do something useful
  • Computers can be taught not to pass on viruses
  • Computers do exactly what you tell them to
  • Computers do not use perfumes, they do not have bad smells!
  • Computers don't ask for money
  • Computers don't buy a new pair of shoes every month
  • Computers don't eat all of the good stuff from your fridge first
  • Computers don't eat your chocolate
  • Computers don't expect you to be able to read their minds
  • Computers don't fall asleep during Match of the Day
  • Computers don't get crazy if you get up and walk away in mid-sentence
  • Computers don't get jealous if you use another one
  • Computers don't get ugly when they get old
  • Computers don't get upset if you only use them for 30 seconds
  • Computers don't get upset if you use them for 12 hours without a break
  • Computers don't get upset when you go on holiday without them
  • Computers don't have a compulsive urge to talk crap if they've got nothing to say
  • Computers don't like shopping
  • Computers don't make horrible dinners
  • Computers don't mind if you never speak to them
  • Computers don't mind you farting whilst you're using them
  • Computers don't nag [except perhaps if they're running Vista ]
  • Computers don't order stupid entree's in restaurants, then ask you to trade with them
  • Computers don't say, "Not tonight darling, I have a headache".
  • Computers don't think
  • Computers don't try to introduce you to their parents
  • Computers don't want pets or babies
  • Computers don't watch mindless sit-coms on TV
  • Computers don't bitch about their friends
  • Computers don't have periods
  • Computers don't require chocolate to make them happy
  • Computers have good memory
  • Computers give you another chance if the RAM goes bad
  • Computers have more things to press
  • Computers like being chained to a desk (some even have bondage ports built in)
  • Computers like to play with each other for you
  • Computers never leave you for your best friend
  • Computers never smell of fish
  • Computers play games or get serious when YOU want to
  • Computers reboot much faster
  • Computers stay the same size, even after 5 years
  • Computers stay when you tell them too
  • Computers treat your woman with the same respect as you
  • Computers usually tell you when they have a virus
  • Computers will accept a 3 1/2 inch floppy and be happy
  • Computers will go down on you
  • Computers will help you solve your problems
  • Computers work better the more RAM you put in them
  • It's easy to upgrade to a newer model
  • It's not embarrassing to take a differently colored one to see your parents
  • The old computer works just the same even after you've got a new model
  • When your computer starts to smoke you can get another one
  • Women usually have good hardware but bad software
  • You can change computer hardware or software when you want to
  • You can deal with computer outputs
  • You can delete things you don't want your computer to remember
  • You can invite lots of friends of both sexes to play with your computer all together and it won't complain
  • You can name your computer anything you want
  • You can share your computer with your friends
  • You can stop for a beer break whilst using your computer, it just waits for you to come back
  • You can switch off a computer
  • You can turn on a computer, have a beer, watch the big match, and when you come back, it's still turned on
  • You can turn the computer off when the footy's on
  • You can turn the sound off
  • You can upgrade your computers FAT partitions
  • You can use your computer as many times as you want
  • You don't get BLOND computers [Alien edit: yes you do, they're called Macs ]
  • You don't need to continually tell your computer you love it
  • You don't need to cook for computers
  • You don't need to pay computers for adult fun
  • You don't need to wine and dine a computer before you use it
  • You don't need to remember your computers birthday or anniversary
  • You only have to punch information into a computer once
  • You're never embarrassed to show your computer to your parents, even when it's really old
  • Your computer always looks good in the morning
  • Your computer doesn't go home to mum if your office computer went down on you today
  • Your computer is always a pleasure to turn on
  • Your computer never makes you sleep in the wet spot
  • Your computer will happily play crude adult games with you
  • Your new computer doesn't mind using the old computers extras
    • [*]Your new computer is happy to sit on the old computers furniture[/list]
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      Zero2Cool (5h) : No Doubs could be issue Thursday
      Mucky Tundra (10h) : Bears. Santos. Blocked FG
      Zero2Cool (21h) : Bears. Vikings. OT
      Mucky Tundra (21h) : Thems the breaks I guess
      Mucky Tundra (21h) : Two players out and Williams had an injury designation this week but Oladapo is a healthy scratch
      Zero2Cool (22h) : Packers inactives vs 49ers: • CB Jaire Alexander • S Kitan Oladapo • LB Edgerrin Cooper • OL Jacob Monk
      TheKanataThrilla (24-Nov) : Aaron Jones with a costly red zone fumble
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      packerfanoutwest (23-Nov) : Report: Aaron Rodgers wants to play in 2025, but not for the Jets
      beast (23-Nov) : That's what I told the Police officer about my speed when he pulled me over
      packerfanoutwest (23-Nov) : NFL told Bears that Packers’ blocked field goal was legal
      packerfanoutwest (22-Nov) : 49ers are underdogs at Packers, ending streak of 36 straight games as favorites
      Zero2Cool (22-Nov) : 49ers might be down their QB, DL, TE and LT?
      packerfanoutwest (22-Nov) : Jaire Alexander says he has a torn PCL
      Zero2Cool (20-Nov) : Even with the context it's ... what?
      Mucky Tundra (20-Nov) : Matt LaFleur without context: “I don’t wanna pat you on the butt and you poop in my hand.”
      beast (20-Nov) : We brought in a former Packers OL coach to help evaluate OL as a scout
      beast (20-Nov) : Jets have been pretty good at picking DL
      Zero2Cool (20-Nov) : He landed good players thanks to high draft slot. He isn't good.
      Zero2Cool (20-Nov) : He can shove his knowledge up his ass. He knows nothing.
      beast (20-Nov) : More knowledge, just like bring in the Jets head coach
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : What? Why? Huh?
      beast (19-Nov) : I wonder if the Packers might to try to bring Douglas in through Milt Hendrickson/Ravens connections
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : The Jets fired Joe Douglas, per sources
      packerfanoutwest (19-Nov) : Jets are a mess......
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : Pretty sure Jets fired their scouting staff and just pluck former Packers.
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : Jets sign Anders Carlson to their 53.
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : When you cycle the weeks, the total over remains for season. But you get your W/L for that selected week. Confusing.
      packerfanoutwest (19-Nov) : the total and percentage are the same as the previous weeks
      packerfanoutwest (19-Nov) : the total and percentage are the same as the previous weeks
      packerfanoutwest (19-Nov) : the totals are accurate..nrvrtmind
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : I don't follow what you are saying. The totals are not the same as last week.
      packerfanoutwest (19-Nov) : ok so then wht are the totals the same as last week?
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : NFL Pick'em is auto updated when NFL Scores tab is clicked
      Martha Careful (19-Nov) : The offense was OK. Let's not forget the Bear defense is very very good.
      packerfanoutwest (19-Nov) : Who updates the leaderboard on NFLPickem?
      beast (19-Nov) : Has the Packers offense been worse since the former Jets coach joined the Packers?
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : Offense gets his ass in gear, this could be good.
      Zero2Cool (19-Nov) : Backup QB helped with three wins. Special Teams contributed to three wins.
      bboystyle (18-Nov) : Lions played outside thats why. They scored 16 and 17 in the only 2 outside games this year
      Zero2Cool (18-Nov) : The rest of the NFL is catching up to Packers ... kicking is an issue throughout league
      packerfanoutwest (18-Nov) : Packers DL Kenny Clark: We knew 'we were going to block' Bears' game-winning field goal attempt
      Zero2Cool (18-Nov) : Lions seem to be throttling everyone, but only (only) got 24 lol maybe the rain is why
      Zero2Cool (18-Nov) : Packers vs Lions game doesn't seem so bad.
      beast (18-Nov) : Dennis Green "They are what we thought they were, and we let them off the hook!"
      Martha Careful (17-Nov) : comment of the day Z2Cool "Bears better than we want to admit. Packers worse than we think. It's facts."
      Mucky Tundra (17-Nov) : my worst case scenario: Bears fix their oline and get a coach like Johnson from the Lions and his scheme
      Zero2Cool (17-Nov) : Bears get OL fixed amd we might have a problem
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