SINCITYCHEEZE
11 years ago


Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Yuma ,

Arizona . They turn a corner and see a sign that says,

"Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents." They look at each other

and then go in, thinking, This is too good to be true.



The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the

room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you! What 'll it

be, gentlemen?"



There 's a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a

martini. In no time the bartender serves up four iced

martinis - shaken, not stirred - and says, "That 'll be 10

cents each, please."



The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at

each other. They can 't believe their good luck. They pay the

40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round.

Again, four excellent martinis are produced, with the

bartender again saying, "That 's 40 cents, please." They pay

the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them.

They 've each had two martinis and haven 't even spent a

dollar yet.



Finally one of them says, "How can you afford to serve

martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?"



"I 'm a retired tailor from Phoenix ," the bartender says,

"and I always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the

Lottery jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this

place. Every drink costs a dime. Wine, liquor, beer - it 's

all the same."



"Wow! That 's some story!" one of the men says.



As the four of them sip at their martinis, they can 't help

noticing seven other people at the end of the bar who don 't

have any drinks in front of them and haven 't ordered

anything the whole time they 've been there.



Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men

asks the bartender, "What 's with them?"


The bartender says, "They 're retirees from Wisconsin,

They 're waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price.

Wisconsin Born, Packer Bred
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Formo
11 years ago
GUComics.com
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Thanks to TheViking88 for the sig!!
dfosterf
11 years ago

Pulled Over for Speeding














A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding...

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my fifth DUI.

Officer: Can I see the registration for this vehicle?

Driver: Oh, it's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: Yeah. Oh, but come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove compartment when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: You have a gun in there?

Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot the lady who owns the car. She's in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the trunk?!?

The officer tells the man to hold on, backs off carefully, and calls for backup. Quickly, the car is surrounded by police, and the captain approaches the driver to handle the situation.

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

Driver: Sure, Officer.

Captain: Hmm, this license is just fine. Whose car is this?

Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration.

Captain: Could you slowly open the glove compartment, please, so I can see if there's a gun in there?

Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.

He opens it, and sure enough, there's no gun.

Captain: Would you mind if we opened the trunk? I was told you said there's a body in there.

Driver: No problem.

The trunk is opened, nothing in there but a spare tire.

Captain: The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove compartment, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the kid told you I was speeding, too!

Fan Shout
buckeyepackfan (9h) : Sorry 13 mil guaranteed.
buckeyepackfan (9h) : Aaron Jones resigns with The Vikings. 2yr 20mil, 12mil guaranteed.
Zero2Cool (9h) : Adams preffered west coast.
buckeyepackfan (9h) : DeShaun Watson wants a new deal! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
buckeyepackfan (9h) : Josh Allen extension includes 250mil in GUARANTEED money!
buckeyepackfan (9h) : Metcalf traded to The Steelers. Every year I forget this is Misinformation time. Have to quit listening to "The talking heads" 😀
dhazer (10h) : or do we tell them we take metcalf you take alexander lol
dhazer (10h) : I am curious about if we waste money on Metcalf he isn't worth $30 million a year
dhazer (10h) : Adams is going to a good team and gets to play indoors majority of the time can't blame him and isn't he from Fresno?
Zero2Cool (11h) : Rams land Adams of Davante fame.
Martha Careful (12h) : it's funny how guys who are so desperate to play for championships, at least so they say, just take the money.
Mucky Tundra (13h) : Semantics ;)
Zero2Cool (13h) : They didn't return. They didn't even leave! ;-)
Mucky Tundra (14h) : Crosby and Garrett return to their respective teams; truckloads of $$$ solved any problems they had
dhazer (17h) : Russell Wilson will be back in Seattle as a bridge
Zero2Cool (18h) : Bills are releasing pass rusher Von Miller, per sources.
Zero2Cool (18h) : From trade to truce and beyond: the Browns and Myles Garrett reached agreement today on a record contract extension that averages $40m
TheKanataThrilla (8-Mar) : I could actually see Seattle inquiring about Willis.
TheKanataThrilla (8-Mar) : If we took a flyer on a QB, I like Kyle McCord out of Syaracuse. Keep Willis definitely, but don't turn down a good trade.
Mucky Tundra (8-Mar) : RB Kareem Hunt as well
Zero2Cool (8-Mar) : Tyreek Hill also arrested before or during Chiefs time for assault.
Martha Careful (8-Mar) : Kansas City Chiefs wide receiver Xavier Worthy was arrested for assault. They are now even more likely to supplement the WR position
Mucky Tundra (8-Mar) : So weak I had to say it twice!
Mucky Tundra (8-Mar) : But it feels like a weak QB draft class
Mucky Tundra (8-Mar) : But it feels like a weak QB draft class
Mucky Tundra (8-Mar) : I suppose that puts Seattle in play for a QB in the 1st round this year
Mucky Tundra (8-Mar) : Gotta say, didn't see Geno getting traded from the Seahawks
Zero2Cool (8-Mar) : Breer: Seahawks offered the Raiders Geno Smith and DK Metcalf for EDGE Maxx Crosby; Raiders "quickly" declined.
Zero2Cool (8-Mar) : It has 2019 Packers schedule.. yeah, I be slowly coding haha
Zero2Cool (8-Mar) : Finally got the 'new' PackersHome online...
Zero2Cool (8-Mar) : Nice work Seahawks!
dhazer (8-Mar) : wow Geno Smith to the Raiders for a 3rd rounder
Zero2Cool (6-Mar) : Good deal too
Martha Careful (6-Mar) : Maxx Crosby resigned by Raiders
Zero2Cool (6-Mar) : Chargers release Joey Bosa
Zero2Cool (4-Mar) : Appears Jets released Adams. It'll be official in few hours.
Zero2Cool (3-Mar) : We have re-signed LB Isaiah McDuffie
Zero2Cool (2-Mar) : Jets taking calls for Davante Adams. That $38m cap number hurting lol
Zero2Cool (2-Mar) : Guess it's not official until the 12th
Zero2Cool (2-Mar) : Deebo went for a 5th to Commanders?
Martha Careful (1-Mar) : Just like my late husband!!
Zero2Cool (1-Mar) : Once fired up, it should be good
Zero2Cool (1-Mar) : Sometimes, the first page load will be slow. it's firing up the site.
Martha Careful (1-Mar) : The site is operating much faster...tyvm
Mucky Tundra (28-Feb) : It's the offseason and the draft is still nearly 2 months away, what can ya do?🤷‍♂️
Zero2Cool (27-Feb) : NFL teams were notified today that the 2025 salary cap has been set at $279,200,000 per club.
Zero2Cool (27-Feb) : sssllllooooow
Martha Careful (27-Feb) : is it just me, or has the website been slow the last couple of days?
buckeyepackfan (26-Feb) : Damnit 2026 2nd rnd pick!
buckeyepackfan (26-Feb) : Packers get Myles Garret and Browns 2926 2nd rnd pick.
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