Zero2Cool
14 years ago
http://pagingdrgupta.blogs.cnn.com/2010/10/08/thrill-seekers-vs-comfort-creatures-sexual-compatibility/?hpt=C2 

[img_r]http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2010/images/10/07/c1main.sexual.chemistry.jpg[/img_r]I have a confession: I may be a sex therapist, but my own sex life is pretty ordinary. Dont get me wrongmy relationship with my wife is amazing. But if you think my line of work automatically means that we like to visit swingers' clubs or have mirrors on the ceiling of our bedroom, think again. Sexually speaking, my wife and I are both comfort creatures, and that suits us just fine.

Were not alone. In my experience, there are two types of people when it comes to sex: comfort creatures and thrill seekers. The former tend to prefer to keep sex within the comfort of their own homes, with one partner, sticking to a few tried and true positions and routines. And as the name suggests, thrill seekers are just the opposite. They want new positions and toys, different partners or locations, and more sex. In general, a couple made up of two comfort creatures or two thrill seekers has it easy: Theyre on the same page, sexually.

But what happens when a comfort creature falls for a thrill seeker, or vice versa?

Its more common than you think, but most couples dont realize that theyre mismatched until much further along in their relationship. Thats because, in the beginning, youve both been hijacked by a potent neurochemical cocktail of infatuation hormones thats responsible for your constant canoodlingand that masks any differences in the bedroom. Youre so busy getting busy that you probably wont notice potential sexual incompatibility until your infatuation starts to wane.

These hormones can also mask other differences in a relationship, from how often you like to have sex to whether or not you enjoy public displays of affection. According to Psychology Today, one factor that may prove unifying or divisive to a couple is the degree to which their nervous systems are naturally inclined to pursue novel and stimulating experiences. Says Marvin Zuckerman, a psychologist at the University of Delaware: "A person's inherent need for sensation is not necessarily obvious in the early stages of a relationship, when love itself is a novelty and carries its own thrills It's when the sex becomes routine that problems occur."

Sexual incompatibility can have a real impact on your relationship. Maybe you crave sex every day, but your partner is perfectly content with doing it once a month. Perhaps your significant other loves to talk about sex, while the very word makes you blush. Are you destined to break up?

Not necessarily. The brain is our biggest and most powerful sex organ, and its completely possible for sexually incompatible couples to have very compatible relationships. The key to success is communication: Talk with your partner about your sex life, no matter how uncomfortable it makes you, and agree to make some compromises. Comfort creatures can venture out of their shells a bit, and thrill seekers can focus on the benefits within their existing relationship.

One fun way to do this? Take a tip from a recent study at the University of British Columbia and harness the power of fantasy. Researchers found that longtime couples were best able to rekindle romance by pretending they were strangers on a first date. So experiment with wigs and different outfits, assume an alias, and meet your partner at a local restaurant or bar for a rendezvous. Youll get variety and safetyand a hot new way to compromise.


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Fan Shout
Zero2Cool (45m) : If you wanna post about the Super Bowl, please, by all means, open a topic. They are free this month! 😁
Zero2Cool (45m) : There doesn't need to be a topic. There's a playoff prediction thread.
packerfanoutwest (53m) : and there no SB contest over in the other Packer forum, either
buckeyepackfan (1h) : #2Officially Retires!
beast (1h) : Probably no SB topic as people are wore out talking about the Chiefs, Refs and Eagles
Zero2Cool (1h) : Packers reportedly have their new LB coach, promoting Sean Duggan to that role
Zero2Cool (5h) : WR Cooper Kupp is being traded.
packerfanoutwest (17h) : why is there no SB Prediction topic?
Zero2Cool (21h) : Anthony Perkins spent 2024 as a defensive quality-control coach with the Packers.
Zero2Cool (21h) : Packers lose another assistant.
Zero2Cool (3-Feb) : Defensive Player of the Year and Browns star Myles Garrett has requested a trade.
Zero2Cool (3-Feb) : deleted all my browser history and autofill and passwords. gonna be fun!
packerfanoutwest (3-Feb) : too funny
packerfanoutwest (3-Feb) : Lions QB Jared Goff was the offensive MVP
packerfanoutwest (3-Feb) : for the Pro Bowl, which is flag football
Zero2Cool (2-Feb) : Rather, the murder WAS covered up to prevent ...
Zero2Cool (2-Feb) : JFK murder was a cover-up to prevent war with Cuba/Russia.
Martha Careful (1-Feb) : I have always admired the pluck of the man
Zero2Cool (1-Feb) : I remember thinking he was going to be something good.
Mucky Tundra (1-Feb) : The Dualing Banjo!
Zero2Cool (31-Jan) : Jets have named Chris Banjo as their special teams coordinator, Former Packers player
Zero2Cool (31-Jan) : Jaguars have hired Anthony Campanile as their DC. We lose coach
Zero2Cool (30-Jan) : QB coach Sean Mannion
Zero2Cool (30-Jan) : DL Coach DeMarcus Covington
dfosterf (30-Jan) : from ft Belvoir, Quantico and points south. Somber reminder of this tragedy at Reagan Nat Airport
dfosterf (30-Jan) : So eerily quiet here in Alexandria. I live in the flight path of commercial craft coming from the south and west, plus the military craft
dfosterf (30-Jan) : So eeri
Mucky Tundra (30-Jan) : Now that's a thought, maybe they're looking at the college ranks? Maybe not head coaches but DC/assistant DCs with league experience?
beast (30-Jan) : College Coaches wouldn't want that publicly, as it would hurt recruiting and they might not get the job.
beast (30-Jan) : I thought they were supposed to publicly announce them, at least the NFL ones. Hafley was from college, so I believe different rules.
Mucky Tundra (30-Jan) : Who knows who they're interviewing? I mean, nobody knew about Hafley and then out of nowhere he was hired
beast (30-Jan) : I wonder what's taking so long with hiring a DL coach, 2 of the 3 known to interview have already been hired elsewhere.
Zero2Cool (27-Jan) : Packers coach Matt LaFleur hires Luke Getsy as senior assistant, extends Rich Bisaccia's deal
Zero2Cool (27-Jan) : Chiefs again huh? I guess another Super Bowl I'll be finding something else to do.
Mucky Tundra (27-Jan) : Chiefs Eagles...again...sigh
dfosterf (27-Jan) : Happy Birthday Dave!
Mucky Tundra (27-Jan) : happy birthday dhazer
TheKanataThrilla (26-Jan) : Exactly buck...Washington came up with the ball. It is just a shitty coincidence one week later
buckeyepackfan (26-Jan) : I forgot, they corrected the call a week later. Lol btw HAPPY BIRTHDAY dhazer!
buckeyepackfan (26-Jan) : That brings up the question, why wasn't Nixon down by contact? I think that was the point Kanata was making.
buckeyepackfan (26-Jan) : Turnovers rule, win the turnover battle, win the game.
packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : well, he was
TheKanataThrilla (26-Jan) : Eagles down by contact on the fumble....fuck you NFL
Mucky Tundra (26-Jan) : I think this games over
beast (26-Jan) : Eagles sure get a lot of fumbles on kickoffs
Mucky Tundra (26-Jan) : This game looks too big for Washington
packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : that being said, The Ravens are the Browns
packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : Browns, Dolphins have longest AFC Championship droughts
packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : As of today, Cowboys have longest NFC Championship drought,
beast (26-Jan) : Someone pointed out, with Raiders hiring Carroll, the division games between Carroll and Jim Harbaugh are back on (who can whine more games)
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