Zero2Cool
14 years ago

An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution for a client who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed.

As soon as he walked through the door at home, his wife started on him about, 'What time of night to be getting home is this? Where have you been? Dinner is cold and I'm not reheating it'. And so on and so on and so on.

Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a shot of whiskey and headed off for a long hot soak in the bathtub, pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks as he dragged himself up the stairs.

While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife answered and was told that her husband's client, James Wright, had been granted a stay of execution after all. Wright would not be hanged tonight. Finally realizing what a terrible day he must have had, she decided to go upstairs and give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door, she was greeted by the sight of her husband, bent over naked, drying his legs and feet.

'They're not hanging Wright tonight,' she said.

To which he whirled around and screamed:



FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WOMAN, DON'T YOU EVER STOP?


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Nonstopdrivel
14 years ago
That is a truly horrible pun. +1
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Formo
14 years ago
LOL
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Thanks to TheViking88 for the sig!!
zombieslayer
14 years ago
Heh. That was pretty good.
My man Donald Driver
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(thanks to Pack93z for the pic)
2010 will be seen as the beginning of the new Packers dynasty. 🇹🇹 🇲🇲 🇦🇷
Cheesey
14 years ago
We have been PUNished by this post.

(Good job!!!)LOL!
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BDota
14 years ago
I LOLed
blank
Packerchick
14 years ago
didnt quite get it at first until the end. Not hanging wright tonight LOL.
I am a woman and I love football.
yooperfan
14 years ago

didnt quite get it at first until the end. Not hanging wright tonight LOL.

"Packerchick" wrote:



Which end prompted you to get it?
Packerchick
14 years ago

didnt quite get it at first until the end. Not hanging wright tonight LOL.

"yooperfan" wrote:



Which end prompted you to get it?

"Packerchick" wrote:



the ending. the guy who was supposed to be hanged was named wright, and the wife said about the phone message, they are not hanging wright tongiht. you will get it.
I am a woman and I love football.
The_Green_Ninja
14 years ago
The world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make is taking a stroll down his local town. As he passes by the record shop, a sign catches his eye: "Just Released - New LP - Wasps of the World and the sounds that they make - available now"

Unable to resist the temptation, the man goes into the shop.

"I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make. I'd very much like to listen to the new LP you have advertised in the window."

"Certainly, Sir," says the young man behind the counter. "If you'd like to step into the booth and put on the headphones, I'll put the LP on for you."

The world expert on European wasps goes into the booth and puts on the earphones. Three minutes later, he comes out of the booth and announces, "I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I recognised none of those."

"I'm very sorry Sir", says the young assistant. "If you'd care to step into the booth again, I can play you have another track."

The world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make steps back into the booth and replaces the headphones.

Three minutes later, he comes out of the booth shaking his head. "I don't understand it", he says, "I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make, and yet I still can't recognise any of those!"

"I'm terribly sorry, Sir" says the young man, "perhaps if you'd like to step into the booth again, you could hear another track."

Sighing, the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make steps back into the booth. Five minutes later, he comes out again, clearly agitated.

"I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I have recognised none of the wasps on this LP."

"I really am terribly sorry", says the young assistant,

"I've just realised I was playing you the bee side."
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    dfosterf (18h) : So eeri
    Mucky Tundra (21h) : Now that's a thought, maybe they're looking at the college ranks? Maybe not head coaches but DC/assistant DCs with league experience?
    beast (23h) : College Coaches wouldn't want that publicly, as it would hurt recruiting and they might not get the job.
    beast (23h) : I thought they were supposed to publicly announce them, at least the NFL ones. Hafley was from college, so I believe different rules.
    Mucky Tundra (23h) : Who knows who they're interviewing? I mean, nobody knew about Hafley and then out of nowhere he was hired
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    Zero2Cool (27-Jan) : Packers coach Matt LaFleur hires Luke Getsy as senior assistant, extends Rich Bisaccia's deal
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    Mucky Tundra (27-Jan) : Chiefs Eagles...again...sigh
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    Mucky Tundra (27-Jan) : happy birthday dhazer
    TheKanataThrilla (26-Jan) : Exactly buck...Washington came up with the ball. It is just a shitty coincidence one week later
    buckeyepackfan (26-Jan) : I forgot, they corrected the call a week later. Lol btw HAPPY BIRTHDAY dhazer!
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    buckeyepackfan (26-Jan) : Turnovers rule, win the turnover battle, win the game.
    packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : well, he was
    TheKanataThrilla (26-Jan) : Eagles down by contact on the fumble....fuck you NFL
    Mucky Tundra (26-Jan) : I think this games over
    beast (26-Jan) : Eagles sure get a lot of fumbles on kickoffs
    Mucky Tundra (26-Jan) : This game looks too big for Washington
    packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : that being said, The Ravens are the Browns
    packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : Browns, Dolphins have longest AFC Championship droughts
    packerfanoutwest (26-Jan) : As of today, Cowboys have longest NFC Championship drought,
    beast (26-Jan) : Someone pointed out, with Raiders hiring Carroll, the division games between Carroll and Jim Harbaugh are back on (who can whine more games)
    beast (26-Jan) : I'm confused, Pete Carroll and Brian Schottenheimer? When Todd Monken, Joe Brady, Kellen Moore, Kliff Kingsbury and Zac Robinson are availab
    Zero2Cool (25-Jan) : Any reason I'm catching a shot here about my intelligence?
    Martha Careful (25-Jan) : thank you Mucky for sticking up for me
    Martha Careful (25-Jan) : some of those people are smarter than you zero. However Pete Carroll is not
    Mucky Tundra (24-Jan) : Rude!
    beast (24-Jan) : Martha? 😋
    Zero2Cool (24-Jan) : Raiders hired someone from the elderly home.
    dfosterf (24-Jan) : I'm going with a combination of the two.
    beast (24-Jan) : Either the Cowboys have no idea what they're doing, or they're targeting their former OC, currently the Eagles OC
    Zero2Cool (23-Jan) : Fake news. Cowboys say no
    Zero2Cool (23-Jan) : Mystery candidate in the Cowboys head coaching search believed to be Packers ST Coordinator Rich Bisaccia.
    beast (23-Jan) : Also why do both NYC teams have absolutely horrible OL for over a decade?
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    Zero2Cool (22-Jan) : Still HC positions available out there. I wonder if Hafley pops up for one
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    dfosterf (22-Jan) : Jeff Hafley would have been a better choice, fortunately they don't know that. Someone will figure that out next off season
    Zero2Cool (22-Jan) : Aaron Glenn Planning To Take Jets HC Job
    dfosterf (22-Jan) : Martha- C'est mon boulot! 😁
    Zero2Cool (22-Jan) : Thank you
    wpr (22-Jan) : Z, glad you are feeling better.
    wpr (22-Jan) : My son and D-I-L work for UM. It's a way to pick on them.
    Zero2Cool (22-Jan) : Thank you. I rarely get sick, and even more rarely sick to the point I can't work.
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