MontanaBob
15 years ago
We are in the midst of our usual summer heat wave....temps have been 95 to 105 the past two weeks.....and enough is enough. I've been staining our back deck (700 square feet of pure misery) and Mike (remember the fireworks guy?) has been painting a neighbors house the past few days. About an hour ago (12 noon here) it hit 100 degrees so we both quit. Over a cold beer we decided that the Clark Fork River needed our attention, specifically in innertubes. My wife is in Spokane WA with some friends for the weekend and Mike's wife is visiting relatives in Kalispell MT.

Wow, two guys left alone and what else is there to do???? T-U-B-I-N-G!!!! We plan to set sail near Clinton, MT about 12 miles east of downtown Missoula and finish up after a big finale with us doing flips in our tubes going over Brennan's Wave in downtown Missoula. Check out Brennan's Wave on Google Images. Right now the river is flowing at 2600 cubic feet per second, or about 7 miles an hour. Fast enough to knock a horse off it's feet.

There should be some kayakers at Brennan's Wave, so if we get in trouble hopefully some kind soul will pull us out....or up.....or whatever. Hope my life vest and helmet are still ok. I'll let you know if we survive later tonight. If we don't, you won't here from me.
Anyone for a Weenie Roast?
dfosterf
15 years ago
riiiiiiing, riiiiiing, .... "Pentagon, Col. Schmuckatelli speaking, this is a non-secure line."

Me: "He's drinkin' again, this time he says he's going tubing."

Pentagon: "I'll go ahead and get aircraft up and on the way, in the meantime, go ahead and write down all the details as you know them."

Me: "Don't you even want to confirm who this is?"

Pentagon: "Oh, I know...this is UFO/deerhunter/fix my chevy and loan me a tank/bar hopper/guys at/in McDonald's pass guy, right?"

Me: "ya, but I haven't even told you who..[Col. interrupts} Pentagon:"This would be Bob, the squirrel guy, right"

Me: "Ya, but... {Col. interrupts again} Pentagon: "The planes are enroute, we'll sweat the small stuff later...jeez I wish you could get that Bob to lay off the sauce."

:wickedfart:
MontanaBob
15 years ago
ALLLLL-RIIIIGHT! We made it. Our grand finale didn't go as planned as we miscalculated the current and shot over Brennan's Wave like a couple of Vaseline Slicked Up Seals. The water temp was somewhere just above Gonad Shrinking temps and the current was pretty fierce in spots. (like the whole damn 12 miles)
A brief excerpt from the float:

Mike: This is gonna be cool...we should make it in no time at all.
Bob: I'm hoping it takes longer...it's over 100 degrees, I'm hot, and I don't like the looks of that current.

Mike: We can catch a beer at Turah Pines in a few miles.
Bob: Yeah, right! How the hell we gonna stop there? This current, and that stretch of river are going to carry us right past the river edge beer garden.
Mike: Not to worry. I got my cell phone in the waterproof bag. I'll call ahead and order a six pack to go.
(Mike somehow makes the call and places the order)

Bob: Turah Pines is about 600 yards ahead. We should try to get over to the right so they can toss us the beer.
Mike: Why can't we stop and get it?
Bob: Uh, Mike, the water is 20 feet deep all the way through that stretch, right up to the shoreline. You want to step out and get it, be my guest!
Mike: They can toss it I guess.

Turah Pines Bar Maid: "You guys are idiots, but here's your beer. "(she delivers a perfect strike onto Mike's head with a plastic bag and six pack of Pabst.) " And Bob, this is on your tab." (I forgot she was a former student of mine)

7 miles later: Mike: How come the current is picking up?
Bob: It's because the Milltown Dam is gone. (EPA #1 superfund cleanup sight for 2006-2009) The Blackfoot and Clark Fork are running free now...nothing to slow them down.

Mike: I didn't think of that.
Bob: I didn't think you did, you dumb ass. Let's get to the left channel as far as we can. The water is slower there...no rapids.
Mike: How deep is it over there?
Bob: You don't want to know. (145 feet)

Mike: Whew....I can see Brennan's wave ahead. We made it.
Bob: Not yet buddy. We gotta hit the wave just right or we're headlines in Sunday's Missoulian about two stupid guys in innertubes pulled from the Clark Fork River 20 miles west of Missoula.

We hit Brennan's Wave perfectly and shoot over the top crest like Motor-Cross bikers at the X-games. Except Mike is upside down in his tube and I'm laying on my stomach on the tube. (started in a sitting position) We climb out of the now shallow water and plan for another day.
Anyone for a Weenie Roast?
Cheesey
15 years ago
God must LOVE you Bob.........either that, or He takes pity on you!!!

GOD:"Oh my ME! There goes that crazy Bob again.......ok, which guardian angel wants to keep him from killing himself THIS time? Clarence. you want the job?"
Clarence: "No thank you sir! Bob makes "It's a Wonderful Life" seem like a kiddie ride!"
UserPostedImage
Fan Shout
Martha Careful (47m) : We only do the tea before whoopee, it relaxes me.
wpr (2h) : That's awesome Martha.
Mucky Tundra (2h) : How's the ayahuasca tea he makes, Martha?
Martha Careful (3h) : Turns out he like older women
Martha Careful (3h) : I wasn't supposed to say anything, but yes the word is out and we are happy 😂😂😂
Mucky Tundra (3h) : I might be late on this but Aaron Rodgers is now married
Mucky Tundra (4h) : Well he can always ask his brother for pointers
Zero2Cool (6h) : Bo Melton taking some reps at CB as well as WR
Zero2Cool (6h) : key transactions coming today at 3pm that will consume more cap in 2025
Zero2Cool (9-Jun) : Jaire played in just 34 of a possible 68 games since the start of the 2021 season
Zero2Cool (9-Jun) : reported, but not expected to practice
Zero2Cool (9-Jun) : Jenkins has REPORTED for mandatory camp
Zero2Cool (9-Jun) : I really thought he'd play for Packers.
buckeyepackfan (9-Jun) : Packers releasing Jaire Alexander.
Mucky Tundra (8-Jun) : (Context: he wants his defense to create turnovers)
Mucky Tundra (8-Jun) : Giants DC Shane Bowen tells players to “be a damn pirate."
dfosterf (6-Jun) : Semper fi !
Cheesey (6-Jun) : This is why I have so much respect for those that have gone through battles
Cheesey (6-Jun) : I can't even imagine what that would have been like
wpr (6-Jun) : "Come on, you sons of bitches. Do you want to live forever?"
wpr (6-Jun) : Facing a line of machine guns 2 time medal of Honor recipient, First Sergeant Dan Daly told his men,
wpr (6-Jun) : Another detachment went into the Belleau Wood.
wpr (6-Jun) : On the 6th the Marines took Hill 142 but suffered terrible losses.
wpr (6-Jun) : It’s time to remember dfoster’s Marine brothers in Belleau Wood. The battle went on from June 1-26. Nearly 10,000 casualties.
packerfanoutwest (6-Jun) : Nick Collins and Morgan Burnett have signed with the PACK
packerfanoutwest (6-Jun) : he won't be wearing #12, maybe he will wear number two
packerfanoutwest (6-Jun) : He will fail this season, should have retired
Mucky Tundra (5-Jun) : Thus the cycle of Hall of Fame Packer QBs going to the Jets and then the Vikings is broken
bboystyle (5-Jun) : Rodgers to steelers on 1 year contract
Zero2Cool (5-Jun) : It's the cycle of civilizations. Get lazier, lazier, softer, softer and vanish.
Martha Careful (5-Jun) : great point. every aspect of society, including art, culture and sports has degraded.
dfosterf (4-Jun) : Green Bay sweep meant something to society about stopping pure excellence. We have the tush push now
dfosterf (4-Jun) : We old Martha.
Martha Careful (4-Jun) : *front four
Martha Careful (4-Jun) : Re frout four, I wish we had some Green "People Eaters" or a fearsome foursome
dfosterf (4-Jun) : *directions*
dfosterf (4-Jun) : Just don't ask him for driving direct
dfosterf (4-Jun) : Jim Marshall was an all-time great DE for the Purple People Eaters. Didn't like him. That's a compliment. RIP
Zero2Cool (3-Jun) : ooppppss
Zero2Cool (3-Jun) : “Kenny Clark played all of last season hurt by the way and got surgery to fix it in January”
Mucky Tundra (3-Jun) : @ByRyanWood How much did the injury affect him last fall? “A lot.”
Mucky Tundra (3-Jun) : @ByRyanWood Kenny Clark said he had foot surgery in January. Injured his foot in opener against Eagles and played through it all year.
Zero2Cool (3-Jun) : Golden is wearing guardian cap again. I bet he plays with it on too.
Mucky Tundra (3-Jun) : All the stuff I'm reading from Lions fans are pointing at his toe; he more or less has permanent turf toe in one of his big toes
dfosterf (3-Jun) : Kenny played through it, and a shame he gets little credit for that, imo
dfosterf (3-Jun) : Big men. I hope it's not the undoing of Kenny Clark
dfosterf (3-Jun) : Probably his toe. Pretty much a great center. Toe injuries are brutal to bigen
Mucky Tundra (2-Jun) : Lions All-Pro C Frank Ragnow retires
wpr (30-May) : It's all good.
beast (30-May) : Yeah, and I enjoyed your comments and just attempted to add to it. Sorry if I did it incorrectly.
Please sign in to use Fan Shout
2025 Packers Schedule
Sunday, Sep 7 @ 3:25 PM
LIONS
Thursday, Sep 11 @ 7:15 PM
COMMANDERS
Sunday, Sep 21 @ 12:00 PM
Browns
Sunday, Sep 28 @ 7:20 PM
Cowboys
Sunday, Oct 12 @ 3:25 PM
BENGALS
Sunday, Oct 19 @ 3:25 PM
Cardinals
Sunday, Oct 26 @ 7:20 PM
Steelers
Sunday, Nov 2 @ 12:00 PM
PANTHERS
Monday, Nov 10 @ 7:15 PM
EAGLES
Sunday, Nov 16 @ 12:00 PM
Giants
Sunday, Nov 23 @ 12:00 PM
VIKINGS
Thursday, Nov 27 @ 12:00 PM
Lions
Sunday, Dec 7 @ 12:00 PM
BEARS
Sunday, Dec 14 @ 3:25 PM
Broncos
Friday, Dec 19 @ 11:00 PM
Bears
Friday, Dec 26 @ 11:00 PM
RAVENS
Saturday, Jan 3 @ 11:00 PM
Vikings
Recent Topics
46m / Green Bay Packers Talk / Martha Careful

4h / Green Bay Packers Talk / Zero2Cool

6h / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

7-Jun / Green Bay Packers Talk / Mucky Tundra

6-Jun / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

5-Jun / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

5-Jun / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

1-Jun / Green Bay Packers Talk / wpr

29-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / Martha Careful

27-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / Zero2Cool

27-May / Random Babble / Martha Careful

24-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

23-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / greengold

23-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / earthquake

22-May / Green Bay Packers Talk / beast

Headlines
Copyright © 2006 - 2025 PackersHome.com™. All Rights Reserved.