Almost a decade ago I hit one near Black River Falls.. sucked under the passenger tire and got wedged between the tire and van body. I was dressed to attend a wedding.. worst part was that the animal wasn't expired yet. The only option I had available was a tire iron to dispose of said turkey and remove him from the wheel well.
Did considerable damage to the front clip, nicked a radiator hose and threw the van out of alignment. And did a number on my attire that day. Turned around and when home after contacting a parts house owner at home to get a replacement part for the cooling system.
Flipping turkey.
"The oranges are dry; the apples are mealy; and the papayas... I don't know what's going on with the papayas!"