How to explain the American political system works to your children:

Dear Billy and Polly,
Politicians are of two types.

One type thinks you need a mommy to take care of your owies and make sure you wash your hands after pooping. These people are usually called “liberals” or “Democrats.”

The other type thinks you need a daddy to keep you from being naughty and to spank you when you are. These people are usually called “conservatives” or “Republicans.”

The mommies and daddies like to take vacations and play with their friends, but they argue a lot about where to take vacations and about who can play with whose friends and when. But they love you, and so they hire really nice nannies to take care of you while they are busy playing, arguing, and taking vacations. These nannies, who are called “bureaucrats,” “regulators,” and “tax collectors,” keep your teeth brushed, make sure your doctors give you free lollipops, and keep you from wasting your allowance by hanging out with bad people.

And since parties, and arguments, and nannies all cost a lot of money, mommy and daddy have decided that you can’t have an allowance anymore and you have to get get a job to pay for them.

Love you. See you when we get home.

Mom and Dad

Originally Posted by: Wade