Malicious intent is the key. No one can look into your heart and see what you were thinking. What's so frustrating is instead of delving deeper, asking a few questions and getting to know what the person meant, the worst is always assumed.

Two illustrations. A female friend of mine used the word minga when she was talking to me. I had heard her husband say it a few times but ignored it. When she said it I quietly and carefully asked her if she knew what it meant. She told me no. Since her husband used it all the time she thought it was acceptable. He grew up next to an Italian family and the father said it on a regular basis. As tactfully as I could, I explained it meant the male organ. Italian men use it as a term of surprise like "Wow, Unbelievable or Amazing". I went on to say that she can continue to use it but at least she now knows what it means. No she didn't want to use it any more.

The other story is from the movie Men of Honor. Robert De Niro calls Cuba Gooding Jr. "Cookie" throughout the movie. Every time he is using it instead of "N". The last time is when Cuba is in the courtroom wearing his diving gear and De Niro is trying to help him win his case.


DeNiro has the utmost respect for Cuba by this time. It is not a slur in the least.

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You are SO funny!😂
You try to take away from your obvious racist “white guys” reference by attacking me!
You proved my point! Thank you!!!😁
I actually don’t care if you spew racist remarks. I was being sarcastic, just pointing out how you are being the racist here.
And you didn’t disappoint!😉😂

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*** LOCKED ***

Alright, we had enough of this. We have football to talk about and even if we didn't, this is not going to end well. No one is changing their mind.

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