Zero2Cool
14 years ago

Why computers are like men:
[ul]- In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
- They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
- They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
- As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.
[/ul]


Why computers are like women:
[ul]- No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
- The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
- Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
- As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
[/ul]


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Porforis
14 years ago

- They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.



Computers do exactly as they are told. If output is unexpected, it is either the fault of the programmer or the end user, not the computer.

INVALIDATED
Cheesey
14 years ago
Wow......."GEEK ALERT!"
LOLOL!!!
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Zero2Cool
14 years ago

- They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.

"Porforis" wrote:



Computers do exactly as they are told. If output is unexpected, it is either the fault of the programmer or the end user, not the computer.

INVALIDATED



If one whom is using said computer did not develop every piece of software on the machine, how is it their "input" that is the problem? You're comment makes no sense to the context of the quoted material.

Wow......."GEEK ALERT!"
LOLOL!!!

"Cheesey" wrote:


I was thinking something similar when reading jokes about binary, classes, inheritance, etc and I was understanding the humor. haha.
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djcubez
14 years ago

- They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.

"Porforis" wrote:



Computers do exactly as they are told. If output is unexpected, it is either the fault of the programmer or the end user, not the computer.

INVALIDATED



While that may be true it's all about cultural context.

1) You're gaming and your game crashes. What do you say? "Damn Computer!"

2) You're watching a movie full-screen and your computer restarts because of automatic updates. What do you say? "Damn Computer!"

3) You're trying to work and your computer is running super slow. What do you say? "Damn Computer!"

4) You're invested in a porn video and your screen saver pops-up. What do you say? "Where the $#@% did I put the Kleenex?!"

I agree that computers most often do what they're supposed to (except when they're built wrong) but when in doubt, blame the computer! 😉
Nonstopdrivel
14 years ago

You're invested in a porn video and your screen saver pops-up.

"djcubez" wrote:



That's what pops up when you watch porn videos? Damn, dude, I'm sorry. They have pills for that, you know.
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Porforis
14 years ago

- They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.

"djcubez" wrote:



Computers do exactly as they are told. If output is unexpected, it is either the fault of the programmer or the end user, not the computer.

INVALIDATED

"Porforis" wrote:



While that may be true it's all about cultural context.

1) You're gaming and your game crashes. What do you say? "Damn Computer!"



More like "Damn [game developer]!"

2) You're watching a movie full-screen and your computer restarts because of automatic updates. What do you say? "Damn Computer!"



"Damn me for apparently not turning off automatic updates!"

Absolutely hate automatic anything. Only "automatic" updates I leave enabled are Java and Flash, since they only bug me at startup.

3) You're trying to work and your computer is running super slow. What do you say? "Damn Computer!"



Control + Alt + Delete, Task Manager, Processes, sort by CPU%

4) You're invested in a porn video and your screen saver pops-up. What do you say? "Where the $#@% did I put the Kleenex?!"



When life gives you lemons... *Starts masturbating to flying toasters*

I agree that computers most often do what they're supposed to (except when they're built wrong) but when in doubt, blame the computer! ;)



Nah, I'm firmly of the opinion that the problem is always the fault of the programmer or the end user. Sure, we can't expect programmers to be perfect and when I'm playing a DOS game on a Windows 7 machine 100+ times faster than any consumer-grade processor on the market at the time the game was developed, it's not reasonable to expect said programmers to have time traveling abilities... There will naturally be issues.
Nonstopdrivel
13 years ago
That is what I love about DOSBox. It pretty successfully emulates the feel and look -- and speed -- of a Pentium I or thereabouts running DOS. Even that can be too fast for some of the really old games, so it can be slowed down even further. When I use DOSBox, I feel like I am playing with one of those ancient 386's or 486's that used to be in my dad's office.
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wpr
  • wpr
  • Preferred Member
13 years ago
I borrowed this for facebook Zero.
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Porforis
13 years ago

That is what I love about DOSBox. It pretty successfully emulates the feel and look -- and speed -- of a Pentium I or thereabouts running DOS. Even that can be too fast for some of the really old games, so it can be slowed down even further. When I use DOSBox, I feel like I am playing with one of those ancient 386's or 486's that used to be in my dad's office.

"Nonstopdrivel" wrote:



DOSBox is indeed the shiznits, was just using DOS games of an extreme example of how computing and programming has evolved.
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