I feel your pain LTF. My sympathies.

Today was the day we buried Dad. Of all the friends and family that I saw, seeing 3 of my high school best friends made me break down. I was told they'd be there, so I was prepared for it, but for some reason it got to me when I hugged them. A few hours after the service, I get a picture text from one of them with the text reading, "We got this in McGregor for you guys" (McGregor is a town they had to drive through to get to the funeral).

Here was the picture:


Mind you, 2 of these guys are huge Packer fans. The other doesn't have a favorite NFL team, per se.. Just enjoys the sport.

That said, I found the following picture in one of my boxes from when I was in high school. I remember it always being in my locker at school.

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Oh, forgot to add the Facebook status of my God father and uncle who hates Facebook but only got it to see the tributes people have posted on my dad's Facebook wall.

"Today will be the hardest day of my life. It is my baby brother's funeral, my best friend and a great man. All the great memories of Joel will be all I have left now."

My heart breaks for him.

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lol Oh, and I also forgot.. Daddy was buried with his favorite Hawaiian shirt and his Minnesota Vikings slippers. RIP Daddy. I hope I do you proud and I miss you so much already.

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It is okay to miss him.Tell him...

Everyday will get easier....I had talks with him and he would visit me in my dreams. I am told that is how he acknowledges he hears me..

Whether you believe in that or not, it HELPED me a ton

I hope he can visit you, and maybe it will ease your pain as it did for me

I told Keiana she couldn't enter the next grade until she learned how to ride a bike without training wheels. Of course, I was not serious, but she didn't know that. Early August she made me take her to a parking lot to try and she was very determined to stay until she got it. I was filling out paperwork for our new home when I looked up after hearing "daddy daddy im doing it you watching daddy daddy" ... there she was, my little girl riding her bike with no training wheels an no daddy helping her. I was so proud I had tears in my eyes. I thought to myself I can't wait to tell mom and as I started to grab my phone I realized she passed away months prior so I looked up towards the sky and tearfully softly said "you already know huh?" while wiping away a couple tears.

At work we have a long skywalk between the DC and the Plant. Every single time I'm walking through, I pretend I'm talking to her. It probably sounds silly, but it has really helped me. Sometimes I even vent with comments like "mom can you believe this idiot unplugged the com port again and can't figure out how to plug it back in?" ... she laughs and smiles and I hear her say "Kev I'm sure there are things you don't know that he does, that doesn't make you an idiot".

What I'm getting at is ... although he may be physically gone, he is only as far from your lips as your heart.





Sorry Jeremy, but I have to get this in while I can. Jim, you know this site is substantially better, you're required to post here more often. Thank you. :)



Edit, found this in one of the old avatar archives.  555_14360550924dc2134569831.jpg You have insufficient rights to see the content.

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great posts. 22 Oct is my dad's 81st bday. Aug was 5 years. Every time I turn around there is something that makes us think of him.

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It's been 38 years for me.......i still have dreams about my Dad. Woke up crying 2 nights ago.
They are never really gone until no one thinks of them any more.

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i've been thinking about your family alot.
losing a parent so far is the hardest thing i've had to go through but i know my dad wouldn't want me to stop living life & jeremy, i know joel wouldn't want that for you either. you will have your memories of him for the remainder of your life & then you'll see him again in heaven. that is what i cling to in moments of desperation.

Posted a few things on Facebook I'mma share here:

First, a video I took of dad the weekend I took him into chemo I believe.





And the following caption to a photo:

This was a gift  from the latest Metzinger wedding. We had an extra one, so the following Sunday I gave it to my dad. He was super excited and very gracious as this syrup has always been cherished by him. When I saw our bottle of it tonight, I was cruely reminded that he never got to enjoy his. See, later that night after I gave him his, he slipped into a coma. I crack open this bottle tonight in loving memory. :|

NOTE: The Metzingers are family friends, and they have always blessed us with their homemade maple syrup. Used to be a tradition for me to go and help during high school and beyond.

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