Zero2Cool
13 years ago

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee due to insufficient funds when they already know you're broke?

Why when you push the button for the elevator door to open, but it doesn't, someone comes behind you, reaches out and immediately pushes the button again.........do they think they have electrical power in their finger?

Why is it that when someone tells you that there are one billion stars in the universe, you believe them but, if they tell you there is wet paint, you have to touch it to check?

Why do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose cruel idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that, no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people run over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the first end you try?

How do those dead bugs get into enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart, and then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right"? Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

Why, in winter, do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

The statistics on sanity say that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're OK, then it's you.


UserPostedImage
Packers_Finland
13 years ago
Because kamikaze pilots would die before crashing if they didn't have helmets. What do you think, do pilots have helmets to protect their head if they crash?

Because people didn't evolve from apes.

Because it's polite.
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alharrisdude31
13 years ago

Why, in winter, do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

Originally Posted by: Zero2Cool 


My friend, welcome to the south.
Zero2Cool
13 years ago

Because kamikaze pilots would die before crashing if they didn't have helmets. What do you think, do pilots have helmets to protect their head if they crash?

Because people didn't evolve from apes.

Because it's polite.

Originally Posted by: Packers_Finland 


The helmets are for radio communication.
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DakotaT
13 years ago

My friend, welcome to the south.

Originally Posted by: alharrisdude31 




You're a funny guy! Next time I'm down there though, I'm going to have to try one of those cajun catfish served with head intact. Culture, how can one oppose it.
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alharrisdude31
13 years ago
You haven't lived until you eat deep fried cheeseburgers with deep fried cheese curds, deep fried coca cola (yes, it exists), and a deep fried twinkie, deep fried cheesecake, and deep fried oreos for dessert. Yes, there are meals like this., yes people eat this quite often. Now THIS is southern culture.
alharrisdude31
13 years ago

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Originally Posted by: Zero2Cool 


Yes, but it will be a cold day in hell, and that will also be the day I admit dimebag Darrell is not a top 5 guitarist of all time (which he is!)
Formo
13 years ago

You haven't lived until you eat deep fried cheeseburgers with deep fried cheese curds, deep fried coca cola (yes, it exists), and a deep fried twinkie, deep fried cheesecake, and deep fried oreos for dessert. Yes, there are meals like this., yes people eat this quite often. Now THIS is southern culture.

Originally Posted by: alharrisdude31 



Sounds like the Minnesota State Fair.

Mmmmmm.. NOM NOM NOM NOM greasy deep fried food!!
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Thanks to TheViking88 for the sig!!
Packers_Finland
13 years ago

The helmets are for radio communication.

Originally Posted by: Zero2Cool 



The helmets also have a tube that supplies oxygen for them.

Regardless, it's stupid for the original writer to assume that pilots only wear helmets for protection when they crash.

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alharrisdude31
13 years ago

Sounds like the Minnesota State Fair.

Mmmmmm.. NOM NOM NOM NOM greasy deep fried food!!

Originally Posted by: Formo 


I do admit, you northerners do know how to eat... But the South is where the greasy and beer battered foods are king.
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