We're under a stage 3 air alert here in the Missoula Valley thanks to numerous forest fires around us and a high pressure system that has us socked in with 90+ degree temps and no winds at all. We're used to this and don't think twice about it. Last night around 7pm our daughter Teri, and our cousin Bonnie flew in from Fairbanks Alaska on Alaskan Airlines.
On approach to Missoula International Airport the pilot comes on the intercom:
"We are on final approach to Missoula. Sorry for the smoke that's all around us, but if you point to any direction from here, you'll see forest fires burning. We're going to swing around the valley and approach from the East for touchdown."
Teri and Bonnie look out the window and all they see is smoke and fires.
Teri: "Holy Shit...my Dad must have really let that last BBQ get out of hand. Gone 4 weeks and he's burning the F------ valley down."
Bonnie: "So what else is new?"
They land and Donna and I are there to pick them up. As they come off the plane and through exit security people are commenting on the smoke and smell, which is like a giant campfire.
Teri; "Jeez Dad, what the hell did you do? Light the whole friggin' valley on fire?"
Me: " Nope......I haven't had a match in my hands since March."
Bonnie: "God Bob, last time I came here we had to divert to Helena because of the smoke. What is it with this place.?"
Me: "We like smoke here. Ever since that ban on smoking in Missoula we long for the forest fires so we can caress our lungs with smoke and carcinogens and all that other crap. Besides, it's a good topic of conversation with the tourists. Gets' them to thinking if they really want to stay here."
Teri: "When's our flight back to Fairbanks? I'm going to rebook as soon as I can."
Donna: "This isn't bad.....wait 'till Bob starts cooking those ribs from that hog we butchered."
Everybody picks on me.
Anyone for a Weenie Roast?