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Offline 4PackGirl  
#46 Posted : Monday, May 4, 2009 8:46:52 PM(UTC)
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3 1/2 years since we lost my dad & on a daily basis, the pain has subsided somewhat. however, with every joy in my life, in my boys lives, in my family's life - there is that sting of pain knowing my dad isn't there with us. i firmly believe that will never change. my brother & i were talking a couple days ago about my dad. this time of year & the fall are extremely difficult for us. not being in the field helping him is this empty hole that can't be filled.
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Offline Cheesey  
#47 Posted : Monday, May 4, 2009 11:02:58 PM(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: " Go to Quoted Post
3 1/2 years since we lost my dad & on a daily basis, the pain has subsided somewhat. however, with every joy in my life, in my boys lives, in my family's life - there is that sting of pain knowing my dad isn't there with us. i firmly believe that will never change. my brother & i were talking a couple days ago about my dad. this time of year & the fall are extremely difficult for us. not being in the field helping him is this empty hole that can't be filled.

Unreal...........I can't believe it's been that long Illy.
I can STILL see you and your Dad, as we walked up to you at Lambeau Field. The picture I took of both of you, having such a good time together, will stay etched in my mind!
I feel blessed that we were able to be there to share that special time with you and him.
I will NEVER forget the guy sitting behind your Dad, and saying "Hey......did you know that it says "RACKERS" on the back of your hat?" to your Dad. We thought he was kidding........only to find out it DID say "Rackers!"
Whenever I see the Cardinals kicker, Neil "RACKERS", i think of you and your Dad, and how we all LAUGHED when we saw it on your Dad's hat!

He loved you......and I'm SURE is watching over you!

Just as your Mom is watching over YOU, Kevin!
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Offline 4PackGirl  
#48 Posted : Tuesday, May 5, 2009 5:39:12 PM(UTC)
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it was a very special day indeed, alan. for it to be shared with you & LJ was the icing on the cake.

and the whole "rackers" hat deal was HYSTERICAL!! i remember that as well everytime they talk about neil rackers. that hat along with countless others is still at my moms house. i kept all his packers gear & wear it proudly. i can still smell his after shave in his clothes. i miss him so much.
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Offline Cheesey  
#49 Posted : Wednesday, May 6, 2009 2:03:11 AM(UTC)
Cheesey

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Originally Posted by: " Go to Quoted Post
it was a very special day indeed, alan. for it to be shared with you & LJ was the icing on the cake.

and the whole "rackers" hat deal was HYSTERICAL!! i remember that as well everytime they talk about neil rackers. that hat along with countless others is still at my moms house. i kept all his packers gear & wear it proudly. i can still smell his after shave in his clothes. i miss him so much.

I know what you mean.........my Dad wore "Old Spice", I have a bottle of it.........just to remind me of him.
35 years for me........and I miss him more now then ever. I wish he had been here to see me through my surgery.
Chances are, if they would have known what they were doing back then, he might still be alive today. He survived his first heart attack. Lived for 16 days in the hospital. Had they done bypass surgery for him, he maybe would still be here for me today. He would have been only 80 this year.
Damn.
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Offline Zero2Cool  
#50 Posted : Saturday, April 30, 2011 6:33:24 PM(UTC)
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Hard to believe it's been three years already. :(
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Offline wpr  
#51 Posted : Saturday, April 30, 2011 7:03:30 PM(UTC)
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I am stunned at how quickly the time goes by. 4 1/2 years for my dad.
"You don't hurt 'em if you don't hit 'em." Chesty Puller



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Offline 4PackGirl  
#52 Posted : Sunday, May 1, 2011 1:03:24 PM(UTC)
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time marches on kevin. i'll be thinking of you today & hoping you get through it without too many tears, a few laughs, & lots of great memories of your mom.
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Offline Cheesey  
#53 Posted : Monday, May 2, 2011 4:56:37 PM(UTC)
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Wow....time does fly. And it seems (which i always heard from "old folks") that as you get older, time seems to go faster.
I know it's that way for me.
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Offline Zero2Cool  
#54 Posted : Tuesday, November 1, 2011 11:47:52 AM(UTC)
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It's incredible the amount of physical pain I can handle, yet, the thought of not being able to send mother a birthday card in a couple weeks or seeing her on Christmas ... shoots tears down my cheeks.
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Offline macbob  
#55 Posted : Tuesday, November 1, 2011 4:23:11 PM(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: Zero2Cool Go to Quoted Post
It's incredible the amount of physical pain I can handle, yet, the thought of not being able to send mother a birthday card in a couple weeks or seeing her on Christmas ... shoots tears down my cheeks.


My dad died 10 years ago on (fittingly) on Veterans Day. The ache doesn't really get better. I was crying on the way home from work today hearing a story on the radio about families who had lost husbands/fathers, etc in Afghanistan. It just brought back the whole feeling of loss all over again.

You're a good son, and a good father to a little girl. I'm sure your mom would be very proud of you.
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Offline 4PackGirl  
#56 Posted : Wednesday, November 2, 2011 4:47:08 AM(UTC)
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wow - looking back on these posts - amazing! it's now been 6 years since i lost my dad.
i was a hot mess on what would have been his 76th birthday but did much better on the anniversary of his death.
just grateful to have all you guys to share joys & sorrows with.
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zombieslayer on 11/3/2011(UTC)
Offline Wade  
#57 Posted : Wednesday, November 2, 2011 7:29:57 AM(UTC)
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My big brother died in 1975. My dad died in 1977. I still miss them both.

While I don't ever expect this to change, and so in that sense, the wound never heals, the scar tissue has more or less gotten thick enough so that the "sad" memories are generally blurred enough not to be painful.

(I wish I could say the same about Happy. It's over six months now, and it still feels like yesterday that my sister called me in Columbus.)
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
Romans 12:2 (NKJV)
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zombieslayer on 11/3/2011(UTC)
Offline Zero2Cool  
#58 Posted : Friday, November 18, 2011 7:24:34 AM(UTC)
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To say the weeks proceeding and succeeding April 30th and November 18th are troubling for me, mentally and emotionally would be an understatement the last nearly four years. It's a time when I have to accept mom is gone. I can't "trick" myself into believing she is just not answering the phone or is 1,200 miles away attributing to why I can not see her.

You never gave up on me, even when I nearly did. Finally I started to get it together; graduated college, good career, nice place to live, custody of Keiana and even started repairing my relationship with Dad like you so badly wanted ... after years of disappointment, I started to become a son you could be proud of, ... and then, you were taken from us. It's not fair ... life ... is not fair. I vision you nudging grandpa, pointing, saying "that's your grandson!". I will get knocked down, but knowing you are watching, I will always get up better than I was before. Nothing can keep me down because I have you up there watching and I can not fail you. Happy Birthday mom. You were taken far too soon ... we still need you, I ... still need you.
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Offline Zero2Cool  
#59 Posted : Saturday, May 5, 2012 9:25:48 AM(UTC)
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When the day approaches, the coming weeks tend to be very difficult. This time, I engulfed myself into a project to keep my mind busy. It worked until the day after the fourth year of her passing. I don't remember the song, but Tuesday while at work I suddenly had tears sliding down my cheeks uncontrollably. I can't shake the feeling of no matter how strong I try to be, the more weak I feel.
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Offline Zero2Cool  
#60 Posted : Tuesday, April 30, 2013 9:27:38 AM(UTC)
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Yesterday was the birthday of one of my two idols growing up, Dale Earnhardt. I was sharing some videos with Keiana. She either did well pretending to be interested, or she really was. And today marks five years since mom left us. I used to tell her all the time that she shouldn't worry about me, that I was a big boy and could handle myself. I was thinking of that this morning and when I closed my eyes, I could see her and hear her saying "Kevin Jon!" and then proceeded to tell me how she's my mother and will always worry about me. I'm very thankful for the ability to recall memories so well ... it's as if she never really left.
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thanks Post received 1 applause.
macbob on 4/30/2013(UTC)
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